Karl Klockars

Cable commercials.  Goofy radio programs.  Wacky local morning news programs.  Endless beer references.  A couple restaurants – excuse me, “Italian steakhouses.” Harry Caray might be getting more work after his death than he did during life.  All I can remember about his living gigs are the baseball games – and that was barely work anyways – and the occasional Budweiser spot.

I could be wrong, but Harry Caray is probably more economically viable as a dead man.  See, you don’t have to hire the actual Harry Caray – you just get some big glasses and hand a guy a microphone and a Budweiser glass and you’re already 90% there.  From that point, just try to sound like a drunk camel, and roll with it.

My level of tolerance for Harry Caray graverobbing hit maximum capacity during those god-awful ads featuring John Caponera hawking Comcast or AT&T or whatever the hell they were selling.  Whatever it was, it worked only as a means to annoy a city.   The fact that I don’t remember the spot, just the rising bile in my gut that resulted from it, should prove exactly how ill-fated that run of spots was.  Spots  that no doubt sprung from some uncreative adman saying “let’s get Caponera to say ‘Holy Cow” and we’ll sell millions!”  Followed by a 9-martini lunch.

The most recent egregious example was a WGN Morning News segment this week that un-earthed another goofy impressionist for a “Psychic Chat,” as though this hasn’t been done to death.  Harry from Heaven has practically been a part of Chicago media since before the guy died, for deity’s sake.  Neither original nor interesting, despite the fact that ‘GN’s morning product is usually pretty good.  They’re a lot better than this, that’s for sure.

And I understand that Harry had a sense of humor, and was smart enough to poke fun at his image at his own expense.  It’s part of what made him so beloved in the city – that, and his role as everyone’s half-faded goofy uncle.  But should that make it okay that a full decade after the mans death, his visage is being propped up and danced around and laughed at?  And transformed into something less than “icon” and something little better than “punchline.”

The counter argument is this:  It’s great that people still remember and love Harry.  And the advertising keeps his memory alive, so how can that be a bad thing?  How many people still think about Jack Brickhouse these days?  I’m sure that’s the line of thinking that runs through the minds of whoever controls the use of his image.  I’m not going to make any accusations because it could be his locally beloved wife Dutchie, or it could be a board of directors calculating what to put a big pair of glasses on next.  (I’m leaning toward the latter, based upon her displeasure with the above AT&T ads. But again, not sure.)  But to whom it may concern:  would you consider knocking it off?

I’m not saying this as a Cubs fan.  I’m saying this as a student of Chicago’s media landscape, a fan and booster of the city in just about all its forms, and someone who wants to see an old beloved man’s legacy not get turned into more of a cartoon than necessary.  (Yes, I know, the whole thing was pretty cartoony to start with, which was a lot of the appeal, but you know what I mean.)

If you’re in an advertising firm right now and would consider a suggestion, let me tickle your ear with this:  Don’t succumb to the urge to do any more spots involving a now-deceased baseball announcer.  Don’t hire any more standup comedians with impersonation skills to pretend they can say “Holy Cow” and “It Might Be, It Could Be!”  It’s not funny, it’s not working, it’s just sad.

For those of you that absolutely, positively can’t resist the urge to produce another Harry Caray ad, at least consider the following:  Put your wannabe Harry in a suit and tie, put him behind a desk, and have him sell something terribly boring.  Health insurance, for example.  Or maybe cardboard boxes.  You’ve pounded the idea that Harry was a jolly drunk – now let’s try to do a little of the opposite.  Let’s try to pretend that he was a person as opposed to a caricature.

Deal?