Karl Klockars

First GIS result for "slutty Halloween costume." This will be fun.

Around this time each year, women in their mid-teens through late 30s ask themselves a serious question.  What kind of slut am I going to dress as this year for Halloween?  Slutty nurse.  Slutty girl scout.  Slutty cat.  Slutty teacher.  Slutty Nun.  Slutty witch.

Old hat, says I!  And never let it be said that I’m not here to help.  No, women across the country need help in their slut decisions.  I, ladies and gentlemen, am that slut decider.

This year it’s time to raise the bar, and the hemline.  Up the ante and lower the neckline.  And let’s make things a little more timely, can’t we?  After all, you don’t want to show up wearing last years slutty costume.  You’ve got to innovate!  You want to have the freshest slutty costume at the whole party, don’t you?  Of course!  Just take to heart the following simple steps and you’ll know how to make yourself a better slut…ty costume wearer.  You’re not really a slut.  You just…get to pretend you are.  Yeah.  That’s it. (more…)